Reflections
by justareader13
Summary: Uther reflects on the changes made within Camelot during Arthur and Gwen's wedding. He comes to realize that he's glad Arthur and Gwen are getting married and that Camelot is better off in Arthur's hands than it ever was in his. He also makes a long overdue apology and Arthur and Morgana accept that perhaps it's time to move on from the hurt. Post 4x03 AU


**Characters:** Semi-redeemed!Uther, Gwen, Arthur, Merlin, Semi-redeemed!Morgana & Mordred with mentions of other

**Pairings:** Gwen/Arthur (romance), implied Merlin/Morgana (romance), Arthur/Uther/Gwen/Morgana/Mordred (family), some OT4ness towards the end

**Rating:** T (just to be safe)

**Timeline:** season 4 divergence (post 4x03)

**Summary:** Uther reflects on the changes made within Camelot during Arthur and Gwen's wedding. He comes to realize that he's glad Arthur and Gwen are getting married and that Camelot is better off in Arthur's hands than it ever was in his. He also makes a long overdue apology and Arthur and Morgana accept that perhaps it's time to move on from the hurt. Post 4x03 AU.

_**/**_

At first, Uther wasn't exactly pleased when Arthur used magic to save his life. His displeasure grew when the old sorcerer who was vaguely familiar to him informed them that someone knew of what Arthur wished to do and tried to kill the king with counter magic. Arthur soon realized the traitor was Agravaine as the only people who knew of his plan were Gaius, Merlin, Gwen and the black haired lord. Arthur knew for sure it wasn't Gaius or Gwen who had devoted themselves to caring for the old king despite the things he had done to them and Arthur was sure pigs would fly before Merlin did anything that would hurt Arthur in such a way no matter his feelings for Uther. The only person left was Agravaine. It was painful for Arthur, Uther knew, to admit that his beloved Uncle and the only vestige he had left of his mother was plotting against him. Arthur couldn't kill though and instead exiled him to never return upon pain of death, before he left Agravaine revealed that the reason for his derision against Arthur was that he knew the true circumstances of Ygraine's death and had revealed them once again to Arthur. Arthur didn't believe but Merlin and Gaius spoke up and told him the truth and Uther finally admitted it to his son. He was livid, of course, that Uther had lied to him when he had asked him point blank about it and that his father had started a genocide for his own blunder. Uther himself was feeling remorse and guilt for his actions. He knew he would never be able to make up for it so even though he was better he did not reassume the throne but instead decreed that Arthur would be officially crowned king. He already was the king in all but title anyway.

It wasn't very often that kings watched their heir succeed them but he felt Arthur was ready for the responsibility and he had to focus more on being a father. Of course, there were things Arthur had done in the past year since he was king that Uther himself would never have whether through his own prejudice or cowardice. He had knighted more commoners and no longer based knighthood simply on the family name or nobility of the blood. He had begun proceedings to lift the ban on magic and already had made peace treaties with the druids. It was a widely spread tale of how King Arthur Pendragon personally went to a druid memorial and apologized to the spirit of a young boy slaughtered in one of his raids and had made a promise to the boy to treat his people with the respect they deserved. It was always told with such pride in their king, pride Uther knew he didn't receive, least of all from the commoners he frequently neglected unlike Arthur. They spoke of how Arthur went to the boy's mother and made sure that she and her two other young children were secure financially for the rest of their days. He made the woman a lady of court and the druid woman, Lady Jane Uther believed her name was, was being courted by Sir Leon. Arthur had also adopted a druid boy as his ward. The boy Uther was going to have executed who he later learned that Arthur helped escape. Mordred was his name and the thirteen year old avoided the old king like the plague and Uther avoided him when he could. Other than at dinner, they stayed away from each other. Mordred avoided him out of fear, Uther avoided him out of guilt.

Merlin had also revealed himself as a warlock. Uther had actually laughed, in private of course, when he realized there was powerful magic right under his nose the entire time as he would come to find out Merlin was no ordinary hedgewitch. He was surprised to learn that the manservant had saved his life more than once even after Uther had thrown him in the stocks multiple times and had him arrested, had insulted his intelligence more than once and turned his mother away when their village was in danger. Merlin had quite vocally said he did nothing for Uther, he had called Uther out for the tyrant he was right in front of entire court and assembled knights and had said the only reason that he had done anything for Camelot was for Arthur and Gwen's sake. They were his friends and Arthur was his destiny, he held no love for the old king or sympathy. Arthur had been livid at Merlin's betrayal but eventually got over it as he acknowledged the reasons behind his lies and made him the court sorcerer.

Morgana had returned once news spread that Arthur was in the process of raising the ban on magic, that he had already made peace with the druids. She turned herself in and even though Arthur imprisoned her at first for her crimes and the people called for her death he didn't execute her just as he hadn't executed Agravaine. He had hope that he and his sister could reconcile especially since after they talked he realized she didn't truly hate him. Any ill feelings towards him was just a byproduct of her hatred for Uther. The new king wouldn't forget what she had done and instead of just letting her go into exile he kept her at court and had released her into Merlin's custody as he was the only one who could control her but Morgana seemed to be more docile than she had been in a long time. She actually listened to Merlin, who she frequently called Emrys, for a reason Uther wasn't sure of. She was quite volatile to him at first but Uther had caught the sorcerer visiting her multiple times when she was at her cell and back in her old room and as time went on they seemed to grow more and more amicable. He thought that something was going on between them but he wasn't sure and it wasn't like he could just ask her.

Her feelings about her father seemed sporadic at best. Sometimes she would say hello to him, sometimes she would just glare at him. Sometimes she joined him, Arthur, Mordred and Guinevere for dinner and she would speak to him if he spoke to her but otherwise she would only willingly speak to Arthur, Gwen or Mordred. Other days she made a servant tell them that she couldn't stand to be in same room as Uther, that the sight of him left her physically sick, and so she would dine with Merlin and Gaius. Yet despite her continued dizzying emotions when it came to him, she had apologized to Guinevere and Arthur for all she had done to them and publicly apologized to the citizens of Camelot. Most of them did not accept her apology yet they trusted Arthur's judgement all the same so they just made due with the fact she was there. She was never seen alone though. Whenever she was seen she was always in company of Merlin and sometimes she was seen with Arthur, Mordred and/or Guinevere as well.

Guinevere.

She was the reason Uther was now stood in the Great Hall with many other guests awaiting her arrival. Arthur was marrying her. She was no longer just a maid but she was technically a lady because her brother was a knight. Even so, there was no laws against their union when she was simply a maid. Uther knew that no law or decree was going to stop Arthur from marrying her. He had enough time to observe the two now that he was better and no longer king and he realized what he hadn't seen before: his son was a man completely and totally in love. Arthur lit up whenever she walked into a room, she seemed to give him strength and she made him happy. She gave sound advice and had the wisdom of a queen despite her humble beginnings. Even Morgana, who Uther acknowledged had become stoic at best, seemed to favor Guinevere and was most repetant to her. She had the previous day walked into Uther's room, said Gwen would make a just, fair and wise queen and then walked right back out. Uther secretly thought the same.

The woman was pure of heart. Uther had caused the death of her father, had nearly executed her more than once and yet she still cared for him in his time of need. He knew she didn't do it for him but for Arthur, just like Merlin, but he had seen her heart and her true nature during that time. He knew that he was wrong about her, she wasn't some sorceress who bewitched his son, she was one of a kind and he knew Ygraine would've liked her very much and she would've been proud of Arthur for following his heart despite what others, even Uther, said. He hadn't had the chance to tell Arthur and Gwen of his shifting feelings, there was little time to do so with all the wedding preparations. He looked towards Arthur who stood nervously at the altar with Geoffrey. He was nervous, Uther could tell. The blonde king switched his eyes to his father. Their relationship was still tense at times but they both wanted to reconcile, especially with Morgana in Camelot. Uther gave Arthur a small, reassuring smile. Arthur returned the small smile with a grateful expression on his face before looking up as the doors finally opened.

Arthur's closest knights walked into the room first as they were his groomsmen and they were escorting Gwen's bridesmaids. Sir Leon walked in escorting Lady Jane, Sir Gwaine was escorting Princess Elena and Sir Percival escorted Lady Marian, Gwaine's sister. They walked up to the altar and took their respective places. Next, Morgana walked into the room alone. She looked slightly put off but was still a vision in purple.

_She was always beautiful, so much like her mother, but her beauty was never the probably. My lies were and look what they have borne._ Uther thought regretfully.

He noticed that the people seemed weary of her and tense in her presence but Gwen had made her her maid of honor and Arthur wanted her to be apart of the wedding. Morgana herself looked uncomfortable with the scrutiny and she tried to ignore the little whispers. Arthur gave her a comforting but confused smile. She looked almost lost as she walked, like she was missing something. She was about halfway down the aisle when Merlin appeared by the door and ran down the aisle to catch up to her.

"Sorry I'm late, lost track of time." He said sheepishly while Arthur glared hard at him. Uther rolled his eyes. Merlin wasn't a fool but he could be a real idiot sometimes. Morgana rolled her eyes at his lateness but just grabbed the best man's hand and practically dragged him down the aisle. Uther noted that the congregation relaxed once they saw that Merlin was there, they weren't as afraid of Morgana anymore, and she seemed much more comfortable with Merlin by her side. They didn't separate like the other couples did but instead they both moved to stand behind Arthur who glared at Merlin once more with a promise of vengeance in his eyes. Mordred walked in next wearing all the finery of a prince. Arthur and Gwen along with Morgana doted on the boy and he looked like he had always been royalty. He walked down the aisle with his head held high whilst he had a white pillow with two rings on it in his hands. He stood a little behind where Gwen would stand. Arthur took his eyes from the door briefly to bestow Mordred with a smile before he looked back up as the music signalling Gwen's arrival played.

He was terrified. What if she didn't come? What is she changed her mind? What if it wasn't her walking down the aisle?

_Well who else would it be Arthur? It's not like Vivian's here and I think Elyan would notice if the bride wasn't his sister. Great now I'm talking to myself, I'm going mad. I'm losing it. Breath, damn it! Breath!_

His eyes caught his father's once again and he gave him another reassuring smile before nodding towards the aisle. In his moment of panic he didn't realize Gwen had already entered on Elyan's arm. He immediately froze when he saw her. She looked gorgeous in her ivory and golden dress. She was an angel in sleeveless velvet with gold flowery lace overlay which contrasted with her skin color in a mesmerizing way. She showed a tasteful amount of cleavage, she had a pearl earring and necklace set on which had belong to her mother and was wearing a diamond hair clip in her half up-half down do that had belonged to Ygraine. The train of the dress wasn't too long but the dress was so long that it covered her legs entirely and she looked like she was gliding gracefully towards Arthur. She had a dazzling smile set on her lips as her eyes never strayed from his.

This was what Uther hadn't seen before and he didn't know how he missed it. This was obviously true love and he was ashamed that he had ever tried to come between them. He felt an odd sense of contentment. He hadn't thought he would live to see Arthur marry. Whenever he brought it up the prince had seemed dead set against it except for that one instance with Elena where Uther had brought the lady in question to Arthur without the prince's knowledge. He now knew why Arthur had been so adamant in his refusals. He didn't want to take the gamble that he could give his heart to another when he already knew it belonged to Guinevere. Uther understood this concern, his and Ygraine's was an arranged marriage and he had feared he would not love her but he was lucky to have fallen for her and have her fall in love with him as well. That wasn't always the case in such situations. He knew if she were there that day she would be so proud of Arthur for following his heart and fighting for love instead of acquiescing to duty and the status quo. Uther was proud as well. He watched Arthur snap out of his daze enough to take Guinevere's hand when Elyan offered it to him. He watched his son now and he knew he did the right thing. Uther Pendragon had many regrets in his life but passing Camelot onto his son and his soon to be queen was not one of them.

Later that day the reception was being held and Uther stood in the corner and took it all in. The room was alive with merriment as the drinks flowed and food was plentiful. The druid clan closest to Camelot led by Iseldir were in attendance but they avoided Uther even as they enjoyed the festivities of the royal wedding. People from various kingdoms chose to attend, eager to meet the serving girl who captured Arthur Pendragon's heart. Uther had already interacted with Godwyn, Annis and Olaf, who came without his daughter as she was still enchanted to be in love with Arthur. He had spoken with Gaius but mostly he had been content to sit back and take the moment and the atmosphere in. He looked around towards the dance floor and noticed that Arthur was dancing with Morgana who surprisingly had a smile of amusement on her face as she listened to whatever Arthur was telling her, he seemed pleased that his words had such an effect. He saw Merlin sitting and talking to a man named Gilli, who was Godwyn's court sorcerer. He lifted the ban after Arthur did. The knights were closer together and drinking together apart from Percival and Gwaine, they were with the latter's sister who seemed to whisk them away to lavish their attentions on her and then there was Guinevere who dancing merrily with Mordred. Well they weren't dancing so much holding hands and spinning around in place and laughing. They seemed to be enjoying it and Uther was loath to interrupt their fun especially when the boy was always weary of him but he had to speak to Guinevere. So he walked over tentatively to the giggling pair and cleared his throat. The two turned to him when he did and looked surprised at his presence.

"Milord, is there something I can help you with?" Guinevere asked indifferently. He didn't miss the way Mordred's arms went around her waist and the way she hugged him back comfortingly.

_He is afraid of me._ Uther thought sadly.

"Yes, I had hoped that I might procure a dance from you before Arthur returned to you... that is it is okay with yourself... and young Mordred." Uther said politely, giving Mordred as nonthreatening a smile as he could muster. Gwen seemed to catch on to what he was doing.

"So what do you say Mordred? Are you okay with Uther stealing me away for a bit?" Gwen asked the boy. He stared at Uther with his unsettlingly blue eyes before answering.

"Okay." Mordred answered simply, addressing Gwen rather than Uther, before he ran off in Iseldir's direction. Gwen shook her head with a smile before looking to Uther.

"He's still skittish at times."

"Understandable of course, not all can be as forgiving as you." He said offering his hand which she accepted and the two began an non complicated sway as the music being played was on the slower side.

"How do you mean?" Gwen asked with confusion.

"After all I have done to you it is a wonder that you show me any kindness. I know that you only took care of me for Arthur's sake but the fact remains that you did care for me when you didn't truly have to. I have done many things to you in my past bigotry and hypocrisy. I don't believe I can apologize enough for your father's death by my word. I have already apologized to Sir Elyan but I did not get the chance to do so to you. It was wrong for him to die, it was wrong for him to have been arrested in the first place. My need to 'ease my guilt' as Arthur puts it led me to condemn many an innocent man and woman to death. I know I will suffer for my many sins but it would not be right for me to go on and not apologize to you. Also, I must apologize for nearly executing you. I know now that you and Arthur's love is true and I do not believe a better match could have been made than this. You make my son the happiest I've ever seen him and I must thank you for I know I am a source of stress and unhappiness to him."

"Arthur loves you." Gwen managed to say even though she was surprised by this. She wasn't completely shocked though for she already knew Uther had apologized to Elyan and knew eventually he would to her as well.

"Yes I know and I love both him and Morgana yet I know there is more than one very valid reason for Morgana's hatred and Arthur's anger. I have not been the best father to them and I know I am much to blame for Morgana's actions and her time going the dark path and I know I cannot take credit for the good man Arthur has grown into. That credit goes to you and Merlin. I can only thank you for all you've done for this kingdom and for my son. Enjoy the rest of your evening Guinevere, I think I will retire now." Uther said politely before walking away. Gwen stood stunned as she watched him leave the banquet hall. She jumped slightly as Arthur wrapped his hands around her waist.

"What did my father want?" He asked with curiosity and concern. He wasn't sure what to make of the sight of his father and wife dancing together.

"He... he apologized for my father's death and thanked me caring for him and loving you." Gwen answered, knowing what a shock that would be to her husband. He looked at her as if she grew another head.

"My father apologized? _My father?_ Are you sure it was actually him?" He asked with clear disbelief.

"Of course I'm sure, Arthur." Guinevere replied with clear exasperation.

"Merlin!" Arthur called across the room. No one even flinched when he did that anymore. The sorcerer literally materialized with Morgana causing Arthur and Gwen to jump in fright.

"Yes?" He asked calmly. Arthur smacked him in the back of the head and ignored Morgana's glare and Merlin's pained exclamation in favor of asking a question.

"Did you enchant my father?"

"What? No." Merlin asked with confusion.

"Did you, Morgana?"

"I'm not going to dignify that with an answer."

_I've got better uses of my magic than wasting it on enchanting my father... I mean Uther._ Morgana thought before clearing her throat.

"Why?" She asked.

"He apologized to Guinevere." Merlin's head snapped towards the window instantly and he began searching for something before he looked back at the others. They stared at him questioningly.

"I was just checking if pigs were flying." He explaind.

"No, Arthur's right here." Morgana joked. Merlin chuckled as Arthur glared at her and Gwen shook her head.

"Arthur, your father is perfectly fine. I was expecting this. He apologized to Elyan before and I knew he would to me. He didn't even have any words of protest when you announced our engagement and he even suggested I wear something of your mother's. He is healthy now but he is older and I believe that seeing all you have done for Camelot from an informed outsider's view has made him realize all that he has done wrong. He wants to make amends where he can. The blood on his hands will not wash away and he cannot possibly personally atone with all those who he has hurt for many are already dead but he can at least apologize to the living he has harmed and me and Elyan are on that list. He seems to be trying to be nice to Mordred, he wants to make up with both you and Morgana though he understands your feelings. Do not be surprised if he apologizes to you Merlin. I believe Uther is changing. It may be late but I do not believe it is entirely too late." Guinevere said thoughtfully, the others took in her words silently and with rapt attention. Surprisingly it was Morgana who spoke next.

"Perhaps you are right Gwen." She wasn't as bad as Uther, thankfully she hadn't gotten that far but she was still pretty bad. If it hadn't been for Arthur's change of heart where magic was involved she shuddered to think where she would be. She had already had a score of people shot down simply to prove a point and she had caused hurt to those she had loved. Arthur and Guinevere she regretted hurting the most yet she was atoning for it. She and Emrys had gotten a lot of bad blood out in the open and he now was as a lifeline to her in her quest for redemption and she still believed that redemption lay with Arthur, Gwen and Mordred but perhaps she couldn't fully be redeemed unless she forgave her father and actually decided whether or not to just be at least amicable with him rather than letting servants relay her hated filled messages for her.

"Guinevere is always right, even when I don't like it." Arthur said. He loved his father, he always had and he always would, but he was just so angry. His entire life was based off lies and deceit and the bloodshed of the innocent. He nearly lost Gwen through Uther's actions, he nearly lost Morgana, he nearly lost himself but he had lost his mother. That was unforgivable and perhaps it wasn't something meant to be forgiven or even completely forgotten but maybe it was time for them all to move on. They were on the cusp of something great afterall and Arthur wouldn't object to his father bearing witness to it. It was with lighter hearts that the ones bound by destiny slept that night knowing that for once everything would be alright.

**REVIEWS? First time writing Uther's POV albeit at repentant Uther. I didn't feel like making him evil (or Morgana for that matter) so I made them both kind of redeemable without excusing their crimes.**


End file.
